Frugal September

So many things have been going on this month.  We finally got our debt below $200,000.  Yes, $200,000 - the several degrees between my husband and myself, and a very small car loan that is almost finished.  This is a great accomplishment!  It makes me even more fired up.  The plan is to pay off that whole amount by July 1, 2021.  We are really working hard to do it!  Making everything from scratch, saying no to most wants, selling things, reducing every expense possible....these are all things that we are doing to pay off debt.

One of the ways that we save money is by doing all personal care ourselves.  This includes haircuts and hair styling for our family.  As you can tell by my profile picture, I am African-American.  As such, my hair requires a bit of a different kind of attention.  This is also true for my daughters.  I already know how to do many things like cornrow, flat twist, two strand twist, etc.  But this month I endeavored to learn a new skill: braid extensions.  This involves adding hair to one's natural hair to not only provide volume and length, but to a break from the stress of daily styling. Braid extensions can cause tension on the hair line, so for me, being able to do it myself allowed me to control the amount of tension and make sure that there was no pulling, which ultimately lead to hair loss, headaches and even sores if not done properly.

I am really proud of the job I did.  This style could have cost as much as $150 at a salon.  I only paid $15 for the hair :)  It took about 4 1/2 hours:

My youngest daughter did not want extensions, so we worked together to find a style that would be appropriate for her fist day of school:

What new skills are you teaching yourself to save money?

10 Minutes

In ten minutes I made a change to an area of my living room that has bothered me for over a year.  It cost $0, just a thought as to how to make the area useful and a bit more beautiful.  Just shopped the house really quickly and went from this sad, neglected space:

To this, with just a bit more life and a bit more umph:

Just a very small change in using a picture that was being stored in our basement, adding a bit of art from my children a small candy dish and some cd's that were laying around.  It just makes the space appear more intentional and that makes a big difference.  And a $0 budget for it makes this frugal mommy smile.  I pray to make many similar changes throughout the house this week as I prepare the house for the new school year.

What small changes can you make in your house today?

Blessings!

Adventures in Dehydrating

My new Excalibur dehydrator is amazing.  I mean, AMAZING!  I just got it two days ago after  literally years of imagining what I could do with one.  I set to work right away. Mango, eggplant, ginger (for ground ginger) peaches, kale....all of these have been experimented with.  Each one has been incredible.  I wanted to have this so that I could really make sure the kids had healthy snacks in their school lunches and so I would not have to spend so much on dried fruits and veggies.  Now that I have a great source for inexpensive fruits and veggies year round (more on that in a separate post), having this dehydrator is going to just add additional cost savings.  I am so excited about it!  I have been sending pics to close friends and family of some of my creations and they are equally amazed. All of it tastes like something from Whole Foods or Trader Joe's, and it is not because I am doing anything special (although I did specially season the eggplant - it was SOOO good!) but because what God has created is beautiful and tasty all on its own.

Also, the sun tea that I made a couple of days ago was really good.  I am going  to start doing that more.  There is no bitterness in the tea, just flavor.  It needs no sweetener at all.

I have really been trying to stay productive in the house, but still feels like nothing is getting done.  I have tremendous respect for women that work from home and/or stay at home with children.  It is a lot of work.  For me, trying to get work done AND simultaneous be present for my children's needs are two arduous tasks. But with God, all things are possible and He has extended me a lot of grace.

On the debt payoff front, in less than two weeks our children will be back in school and my husband's teaching job will begin again.  This means we can transfer all of the money that we've stored in savings directly to debt payoff - as soon as he gets his first paycheck.  I think we will actually be able to pay off our (small) vehicle loan next month!  How exciting is that!  When we get back to paying off debt next month, I plan on doing more posts about budgeting and how Dave Ramsey's plan is working for us.

Blessings!
 

A Productive Morning

This morning I got so much stuff done.  I washed and hung a couple of loads of laundry, made steel cut oats for breakfast (my 5 year old carefully cut of strawberries with a butter knife to go on top!), set out a jar of filtered water and tea bags to make sun tea  and prepped watermelon rind for pickling. Other things were done such as cleaning my room, making my bed, washing dishes and getting some other mundane things done. Now I am working and supervising the children.  We have tons more to get done today but I will be following up with the results of my day.  In the meantime, find joy in yours!

HONEST

Okay.  I have to be very honest with myself and anyone who happens upon my blog today.  I am a failure.  I have failed to make goals, much less meet them.  I have failed to use my planner.  I have failed to stick strictly to my budget.  I have been finding every way possible to use up all the food that we have, and then eating it without restraint.  Now the scale shows I need to budget more than just my money.  

Don't get me wrong, we have done a great job of really buying only what we need, managing money well, and saving during the lean summer months when our household income is lower.  However, I have just lost a lot of discipline in a lot of areas of my life.  My last post was about accountability and in that regard I have really failed. 

One of my brothers recently forced a goal on me - to run a 5k.  Its a race that I have done several times in the past, with no real problem.  But I have not run in MONTHS and right now it seems way out of reach.  My brother paid for me to run this race with him in less than 5 weeks.  So, right now, this moment I have to make a decision who I will serve.  My clothes are not fitting, my self esteem sucks...I snore sometimes at night, I have indigestion a lot and am bloated.  I know what I have to do, I know what works, but when I want to do right, sin is right there with me, keeping me from living a life that is glorifying to the Lord in many many many respects.  So, here we go, AGAIN, recommitting to a better me, a better approach, more discipline.  I pray that I can find accountability through this blog.

One thing that I am very excited about it my dehydrator!  I ordered one recently and am so excited about everything I can do with it! I envision snacks for the kids, dried herbs, fruit roll ups, beef jerky, etc. etc etc!  And I can also eliminate a lot of processed foods from the childrens' lunches for school :)  Makes me really happy.

I also taught myself how to install braid extensions in my hair.  This is something that I wanted to try for a long time....I understand that knowing this skill is one that saves a lot of money, but can also make a lot of money....I think I did a pretty good job, just need to learn how to seal the ends properly. 

I have also been pickling a few different things, learned how to make my own citrus cleaner and am about to make my own laundry detergent....All of these things are great skills and will save us tons of money.  I pray that I have the wherewithal to document everything here :)  

So, let me try again with goals for the week:

Thank you cards for VBS'

Rearrange and clean shelf in stairwell

Tidy up workout space in basement

Complete office space in breakfast room

Workout four times this week

Okay.  I am going to keep the list short and see how we go from there!  Time to get in order before the back to school rush starts :)

Blogging Accountability

I know.  Its been a while.  I have been plugging along, living life and every now and then I will think to myself that I need to blog.  I still journal, but this seems to use another part of my brain...the part that knows that someone, someday may read this and it may be helpful or hurtful.  Words need to be used a bit more carefully and wisely in this space.  Thoughts need to be processed a bit more thoroughly.

I have been reading a number of very wonderful blogs lately.  The women who write them mostly use their blogs as spaces for accountability.  They list their to-do list for the week and then check in to report on their progress.  I think it is a great idea...one that I am going to try to implement here.  Although I won't feel this obligation to blog daily, there should be a bit more blogging happening as I check in.  Another great feature of many of these blogs is that they list their frugal wins as many of them are getting out of debt or trying to maintain a household on little money while they increase savings, pay down a mortgage and/or give tremendously.  I would love to do that as well.

Before I get to my weekly list, a bit of an update.  Of course it is summer where we live and our income is a bit lower in the summer months.  So, while we are working on our debt snowball, it is on hold until the fall months when the income steadies again.  I do have a good feeling though, that, based on our savings this summer, we may be able to pay off our last car payment in the fall if we don't use our savings!!  This is excellent news and I am so excited!  We have been very mindful about keeping our expenses low and really thinking through every coin we spend.  We've had a few car issues this summer that, because of the time we took to think through, really were not major and cost us little money.  Praise God for His favor!

Okay, so my  list of to -do's for the week (in no particular order):

1.  Dust the stairwell shelf (hasn't been done since we moved in - terrible, I know!)
2. Use magic eraser on the wall near the kitchen trash can
3. Make all meals from scratch
4. One load of laundry a day - washed, hung and put away
5. Empty one box from the basement (trying to minimize clutter)
6. Clean master bathroom
7. Mow grass
8. Use free car wash coupon to wash car
9. Send graduation gift to cousin
10. Read Bible and pray daily
11.  Make a prayer blanket for bridal shower

I am a wife and mother and I will definitely have other responsibilities, but these are the ones that I really need accountability for.  I am also teaching myself to really crochet, so when I have free moments I really need to take time to have that shawl worked on.

Just writing this list is helping me to breathe! I may check in on my progress on Wednesday and Saturday and then post my frugal wins in a Friday or Saturday post as well.  As I get back into the swing of blogging, I will also check in regarding the status of our debt.  But since we are in this summer holding pattern, I will probably wait until Fall to do that.

What are your to-do's for the week?  Let me know so that we can hold each other accountable!

Narrow Way

Today I am listening to a sermon by Paul Washer.  A sermon that he preached in 2002 at a youth conference.  It condemned American Evangelical Christianity.  It is soul-searing.  It is heart-wrenching.  It is eye-opening:

I don't have much to say today.  I am pondering this message and its application to my own life.  I encourage anyone, even if it is only one person who reads this blog, to listen to this message.  Paul Washer is not known for niceties or mincing his words.  This message is powerful and very relevant, even 15 years later. You have to listen to the very end.  Please, think about your salvation, your walk with the Lord and your commitment to denying your flesh and instead holding fast the the Lord's promises, benefits and taking the narrow way to follow the Lord. The way leads to Glory, but is marked with suffering and persecution.  It is not an easy road, but it is worth every step.  

What is our Purpose?

Last week I spotted this vehicle, while in thought, and I had to take a pic.  Isn't this the question of a lifetime?  What is our purpose?  Is there even a singular purpose for any of us?  Professionally, I have been repeatedly asking myself this question.  Yes, I am an attorney, but what is the purpose?  I graduated law school 10 years ago, in mid-twenties, when I barely understood myself.  What I thought was my purpose at that time has changed drastically.  And I imagine that my idea of myself will continue to change as I get older.  My ideas about work, about why I do it, how it can be useful and impactful to others, things I would have never considered 10 years ago, continue to shape who I am today.  And that person is vastly different than she was in 2007.

We have all been endowed with great gifts and talents, treasures in jars of clay, molded by the Lord Himself, to give Him glory.  The prayer is that our daily work will help us utilize those gifts in a way that glorifies the Lord.  But that may not be the case.  Is it possible that sometimes our purpose is not even tied to our gifts?  I think so.  Part of our reason for being here on this earth may be to help others in a way that has nothing to do with our gifts, but ultimately is still firmly rooted in our purpose of giving God glory.

There was a time that I thought that my purpose was to be a civil rights attorney.  I thought that I would be making lots of money, have my student loans paid off, never marry, never have kids and living life on my terms.  And then...I met my husband.  I fell in love and married him immediately after law school ended.  I got pregnant...and three children later, my life is nothing like I envisioned it, but it is something that I cherish and would never change.  I have never had a job that I truly desired - I have instead compromised and acquiesced to the Lord's provision for me, which is what I have truly needed.  And I am grateful for all of the places that I have worked.  For all of the great and all of the terrible people that I have met, for the stories I have to tell and for the blessings that I have received.  BUT, how is any of this tied into my professional purpose?

I don't know.  I do know that there is no such thing as a singular professional purpose, at least for me.  I do know that we can be used for and we can all do so many things.  Good and bad.  Professionally and unprofessionally.  But I wonder, today, if I am doing what I am supposed to do?  Is there something else out there that I am missing?  Am I blooming where I am planted?  Am I growing, learning, yielding to God's will for me in all areas of my professional life?

Laziness

Today, while I was procrastinating, I thought back to a couple of incidents from my childhood that predicted the laziness that I often experience personally today.  When I was in third grade, I remember my dad being very upset with me when he read my second-marking period report card.  My teacher called me smart, but lax in doing my work.  I didn't understand what the word "lax" meant.  My dad explained that I was lazy.  I didn't understand.  I did my work, right?  I understood my work.  But my problem is, I did everything at the last minute.  I only gave my work cursory attention, to say that I got it done.

Fast forward a few years later, to sixth grade.  I clearly remember field day at the junior high school I would be attending the following year.  The school was a regional school.  Meaning there were many other schools that would be sending their current 6th graders there for 7th grade the following year.  Field day was the first opportunity for the potential classmates to meet before 7th grade started.  There were all types of events, obstacle courses and games there to do that day so that we could become acquainted.  We were placed on teams with other students we likely did not know.  The last event of the day was a 100m race.   I was NOT a runner.  Not because I couldn't be, but because I never tried.  But at field day, it didn't matter.  Everyone had to compete, without exception.  When it was my turn to race, I remember being nervous.  There were other girls there that just LOOKED fast.  One of these girls seemed especially tall, lanky and confident.  A dead giveaway that she was a great runner, in my mind.  But I mustered up some courage and when it was time to run down the track, I gave this race my all - for about 95m.  You see, I recall being very close to finishing first for the majority of the race.  But I was out of shape and out of breath.  So at the very last five meters, I just gave up.  I visibly slowed down and basically walked across the finish line, while all the other kids ran past me to the end.

This is a pattern in my life. I did the same thing during the final race of my senior year in high school.    Just a few years after this defeat, I found myself loving to run.  I actually broke my school's 400m record.  Senior year, I was in the Meet of Champions - the last race of the track season in our state, where the best runners in the state competed against each other.  I was ranked 12th in the state for the 400m.  It was my last chance to really put my mark on the 400m race.  But, all I could think about was the fact that I didn't have to run track anymore after that.  I was going to college on an academic scholarship, and I was looking forward to no more hard practices...no more speed workouts...rest.  So, I gave the beginning of this race my all, and then at the end, I very visibly gave up.  I didn't walk across, but I got mentally tired about 300m into the race and I told myself I did not have to push.  The end was near.  Just make it to the end.  I was relieved to be at the end.

I think about all of these things now and how they are a part of my psyche. Right now, considering my professional future and looking at my career past, I see that I have a habit of just trying to make it until the end.  I oftentimes just give up.  I don't give anything my 100%. I give my "good enough."  I wonder how different things would look if I gave one thing - something - anything - my all?  I did do that with the bar examination a few years ago.  I gave it full focus, attention and primacy in my life and I was successful.  I don't even know where the strength came from for that, because I did it with three kids.  But right now, I have such a hard time giving anything the same focus.

How about you?  Where do you struggle?  Do you have a similar habit of just giving up?  If this is something that you have dealt with or have overcome, any suggestions are appreciated!

Coupon-clipping Lawyer?

I remember when I was in law school - I was broke.  In undergrad I worked in CVS for three years, part time.  It was a great job - kept me focused and away from trouble, gave me a discount on food and personal care items and a little money in my pocket.  It was while working there that I was exposed to the wonderful world of coupling.  I learned how to stack coupons for extra savings and how to make a dollar stretch.  When I got into law school, I kept up that tradition of coupling.  I was working full time as a paralegal during the day and attending class at night.  I needed to make every dollar stretch.

When I was in a group study session one evening, I made a comment about coupling when I became a lawyer.  It was  part of my psyche at the time, and I knew that I would continue to do the same thing once I was actually a lawyer.  One of my study partners firmly stated that I would no longer have the time to coupon, and I really would not need to anyway, because my income would obviate that need.

Well, I have come to learn that not every lawyer makes at $200k income.  Especially one, like me, who works for a charitable non-profit.  And when your student loan debt looks anything like mine, you are likely to consider doing everything in your power to limit expenses.  I still coupon.  I still look for deals on food.  I make living below my means a priority.  I cook from scratch.  Eating out is a luxury that we rarely afford ourselves these days.  We are literally throwing every dollar saved at this debt.  And it feels good.  I love showing my children how to be fiscally responsible.  They love learning.  We are selling stuff we don't need or want, taking care of what we have to make it last longer, budgeting, and making the most of every day.  This is stewardship.  This is how we give God glory with what He has entrusted to us.

Thinking...

Today is Monday.  First day of the week, and that means back to work.  After a very busy weekend with zero rest, I feel like its going to be a doozy.  Of course, there is the possibility of a snow day tomorrow, so I will grin and bear it.  Why are Monday's so hard???

Today, I will be thinking about future career choices.  I am good at many things, but I feel like my legal skills need sharpening.  I handle so many different legal issues every day, that I know a lot about a little, but very little about a lot :)  Still listening to "Do Over" by Jon Acuff.  It is a very good book that speaks much about skills, character hustle and relationships.  And it has me thinking about all four of these things...how do you attain more skills without going back to school?  How do you attain more skills within your current position?  What happens when your superiors do not encourage that type of professional growth?  How do you attain those skills yourself?  Lots of questions that, at the moment, I cannot answer.

INFJ Lawyer

Last night I took a personality test.  I am trying my best to figure out what is the best route for me to go professionally.  I don't know if I have said it before, but I am a lawyer.  I practice in-house at a local non-profit.  I used to be very happy in my position, but slowly I have been feeling like I am not growing.  I am not challenged.  At the very beginning of the year, I tried to find happiness and more of a challenge in the position by making long lists of tasks that I wanted to complete, hoping that I would busy myself into loving the job more.  But, as the tasks have been checked off my list and with nothing more to add, I have been becoming increasingly frustrated.  I feel that my time is slowly coming to an end, but I want to make a calculated move next.

The personality test, which I have taken occasionally over the years, gave me significant insight into what makes me tick.  It hit the nail on the head by indicating that I am a writer.  I love to write and struggle with this blog because the perfectionist in me gets frustrated by the fits and spurts that I write here.  I want it to be all or nothing - either I write every day and grow the blog, or I never write because it is too much of a mental burden to think about how I am neglecting this space.  I also love to counsel people and help them to find solutions to their problems.  This seems very lawyerly, right? Right.  But one of the frustrations that I had in private practice was that there were social issues that the law could not correct, and I did not have sufficient time to give my clients assistance with the peripheral issues that were impacting their daily lives more than the law could.  Nevertheless, my sessions with each client would be longer than necessary, as I would get wrapped up in their stories.

But what does all of this mean?  Where can I go next that will help me to use all of my gifts?  Or is it even possible to use all of these gifts and talents in the position that I currently have?  I would love to assist the HR department in employment investigations or employee relations, but for some odd reason, I don't think that department desires outside help. So, how do I bloom where I am planted? Or is it time to re-plant somewhere else?

I think I could thrive in the law with another employer, but I am really thinking that I should explore some other career areas, especially HR, higher education and ... I don't know.  If I can get into a position, such as student-advising, in higher education, then I could take free classes in another area that may help me boost my resume and land a lasting career.  But, I also need to increase my income and higher education positions, outside of being a professor, don't pay very well.  The personality test suggested I explore careers in healthcare.  Maybe I should do that?  I don't know. I am so conflicted.  And I really want to make a smart move, but I don't feel like I am the one holding the cards.  (As a Christian, I am sure this is the spot where I should seek the Lord).  Okay, off to my prayer closet I go :)

4:00 in the Morning

It is a bit after 4 am, and I am undone.  I am so tired, but can't sleep.  My mind is heavy with the weight of issues that won't be resolved at this early hour.  On a Saturday, when all I want to do is sleep in, my mind won't rest.  Lord, please give me peace.

I'm thinking about career moves.  Is it time for me to move? Am I really ready? And if I don't make a leap now, what is the alternative? Stay at a job where I am growing stagnant? Where I am not challenged?  What marketable skills do I really have? These are the questions that forced me out of sleep and won't let me go back.

I love to write.  I love to edit.  I even love this neglected blog.  But I don't know what I should do.  I don't even know what the point of this blog is.  As I read other blogs and see how they grow, mostly because of the author's dedication and consistency, I realize that I don't have either of those attributes: dedication nor consistency.  I love to journal...and I think that these brief moments of inspired writing (typing?) here in this space, are just a quicker way for me to get my thoughts out.

So, let me do just that: mind vomit, so that I can go back to sleep.  I really want another job.  I would love to work in a place where I do more writing, but writing about things that matter to me.  Things that engage my mind.  I want to be challenged, and in this way, I would have to do some things that would take me beyond the limits of my small, boxy comfort zone.  If that is not possible, I need to find a way to make my current job more profitable, and more challenging.  I don't think my boss wants that for me right now, but I need it. I am suffering and stifled. Although I am grateful for the flexibility this job has afforded me, I am really kind of over it. I would love for a job that allows me to work virtually.

I want to expand my network.  I want a mentor.  A woman in the same or similar industry that can help me navigate my career path.  I want to cut my hair but am afraid that I will be too lazy to style it well.

I want to start running again.  I want an early morning running buddy, preferably in this development, or in the surrounding area.  I want to run a 10 mile race before the year is out.  

I want to be an ova-lacto vegetarian, as meat and me and grains and me are not getting along very well.

I want to pay off my car and my private student loan.  This year.  And I want another job that pays me well enough to do it.

I want to be a better wife and mother with more energy and more desire to do things in the house (and more time to do it as well!)

Okay, I think that is it :)

How to Reduce Expenses: Invest in a Clothes Drying Rack

My clothes drying rack has been one of my absolute favorite expense-reducers (is that even a real phrase?).  I got it at Aldi last year for $8.99.  It is a seasonal, temporary item, but I found it there just as I was pricing and searching for one at Target, Bed Bath and Beyond and Big Lots.  It is sturdy, holds lots of clothes and I have no problems with it whatsoever.  I use it constantly.  We have a family of five, and therefore naturally generate a lot of laundry.  I have created a system that works for me to almost make using my dryer obsolete. The smallest clothing items go on the sides of the rack, slightly larger items go on the rows of the rack and my towels, jeans sweaters, etc. get hung up on the I-beams throughout my basement.  If this is done at night before bed, the clothes are almost completely dry when I wake up.  I don't mind that my towels come out kind of crunchy, because they loosen up significantly as the steam from the shower hits them and especially when we use them to dry ourselves.

I had gotten admittedly lazy with using my drying rack towards the end of the year.  By using it almost exclusively for the past 6 or so weeks, I have seen a noticeable decrease in my gas bill and electric bill.  Additionally, when I have had to use my dryer, I put it on timed dry, but for less minutes than I have in the past.  For example, I would wash a full load of clothes and then put them in the dryer for 60 minutes in the past.  The clothes would be completely dry when I took them out.  It made me wonder how long does it actually take for a full load of clothes to dry? Are dry clothes just making rounds in the dryer for an extra 15 minutes?  I started drying them for 45 minutes instead and have found that my clothes are just as dry.  If there are jeans in there, they may be slightly damp, but after a bit of hanging up to finish drying, my mission is accomplished.

I have found it cathartic to spend time in my basement hanging clothes.  I listen to podcasts while I do it...it usually takes me about 15 minutes to unload the clothes and get them hung they way I like them, take down any previous loads that have dried and to reload the washer if there are more clothes to wash (there are always more clothes to wash!).

I still use the dryer for my bedding and for our coats, as I have not found a suitable way to air dry those pieces yet.  We live in a community that would not permit us to hang those things outside (and it is unlikely we would be doing anything like that in February!)

Do you use a drying rack for your clothes?Do you have any creative solutions for hanging your laundry or reducing dryer usage?

How to Reduce Expenses: Eat from the Pantry

A mix of things on hand: quinoa, kalamata olives, black beans, etc.

When we moved into our current rental, I was so excited because it had an actual pantry: a small closet in the kitchen with multiple shelves wherein I could store all types of dry goods.  I had never had one of those before and I was eager to put it to good use.

I know a lot of people buy things in bulk and then store those things in the pantry.  I have tried that, but our pantry is so full of all of the other stuff that I rarely get to stock up like I would like to.  Let me explain...

It wasn't until a couple of months after we moved in that I realized that the pantry is the point of no return for a number of my grocery finds.  If the kids don't like a particular brand of chips or cereal, it all ended up being stored in the pantry.  There are countless boxes of dry goods that are partially used because someone didn't like it.

Well, during the past month I slashed our grocery bill almost in half and much of that was by doing some creative pantry digging.  I gently prodded my children to re-try some things that they previously swore off.  Some things they discovered they liked, others not so much.  I also found new ways to use things that weren't fan favorites.  A box of low-fat granola became chocolate chip granola cookies.  Beans appeared in all types of meals.  The ends of bags of rice went into soups and stews.

The pantry is not yet bare, but it is looking much much lighter! And we survived!  Keep in mind that we did not use anything expired...all of our goods were within the use by date range and perfectly consumable.

This challenge to eat from the pantry this month forced me to use my imagination.  I pulled out my cookbooks a lot more this month than I have in a long time.  I had to get creative so that all of our meals were covered.  It also forced my children to really try new things and not just discard something because it wasn't what they expected the first time.  They have no clue what most children throughout the world in food insecure locations endure in terms of lack of access or options when it comes to food.  Encouraging them to try some different foods hasn't (and won't) kill or harm them.  Prayerfully, they will one day appreciate their mama who tried really hard to be resourceful and not wasteful :)

What creative ways do you use bits of discarded and unwanted food items in your pantry? How do you encourage your children to try rejected foods over again?

How to Reduce Expenses: Turn off the Lights!

Okay, the first way that I worked reducing expenses was to turn off the lights.  We live in a home with a ridiculous amount of lights and most of the fixtures have more than one bulb.  That is a LOT of electricity being used unnecessarily! I actually started doing this in December and I saw a significant drop in my next electric bill.  I had to get everyone on board with this.  My children know that if they leave a room, they have to turn off the lights. I will also have them do random checks of the rooms in the house to make sure the lights are turned off.

If I am in the kitchen, I only use the lights that I need. For instance, we have a light fixture over the kitchen table and task lighting over the island.  There are also fixtures over the stove and the sink.  If I am using the stove, I turn off the lights over the table and sink.  If I am using the island, I turn off the lights over the stove and the sink.  I let the rest of the house go dark if I am not present in those areas.

Light fixture above my kitchen table

Task lighting above my kitchen island

I will also try to use a lamp instead of a multi-bulb fixture.  In our bedroom we have an overhead fan with a four-bulb light unit, and we have a bedside lamp with one bulb.  I try to use the lamp instead of the overhead fixture whenever feasible.

I also don't leave the lights on outside at night while we are sleeping.  It is wasted electricity.  Every time we turn on a light, we are spending money.  Every time we turn off a light, we have more money to put towards debt.

Along those same lines, I unplug things that we are not using.  Lamps that rarely get turned on, chargers, small kitchen appliances, etc.  All of those items get turned off and unplugged.  We rarely watch TV during the week, so I try to unplug those as well. All of this may seem tedious, but it really has paid off for us.  And it has made us much more mindful of our wastefulness.  Now, we do keep the hallway light outside of our bedrooms on.  We have children who would not sleep if we did not keep that on, so there is still room for (reasonable) compromise :) But all of the other measures have made a marked difference in our electric bill.

How to Reduce Expenses: Hint, do this first!

When you are confronted with a load of debt, of any size, the best advice that I can give you is to pray.  Yes, pray.  Do this FIRST!

What can I do without prayer?  Well, let me tell you...I can flounder around for 10 years, trying to pay off my debt in my own strength.  I can get frustrated and stressed and upset.  I can be anxious.  I can cry.  I can work and work and work and still not see the debt needle move down.  These are all of the things that I have done over the years.  These things have done nothing for my debt. Not one single thing.  It was not until recently that I invited God into the conversation.  I actually did not realize that I hadn't been praying about it until I started praying about it.  Now, I look back and I realize that I was wearing this debt like a comfortable pair of pants. I saw it as immovable, and just a part of me.  I figured God already knew about it...so there was no need for me to really say anything to Him about it.

And then, there is the shame that I have about having so much debt.  Not only having so much debt, but also having an advanced degree that does not have the income payoff that I originally anticipated.  I am very thankful for the education that my student loans afforded me, but I had a level of naïveté when I took on that degree - thinking that the loans were no big deal because I would be able to command a salary that would pay off in dividends very quickly...and then the loans would just be a bad memory.  How naive I was!  Because of my particular life circumstances, I am not able to command a six figure salary at the moment...and with the elephant I am carrying, there is a certain level of shame.  The shame is not even in the amount, but the inability to make it go anywhere.  Its is a hard dynamic to explain, but I definitely feel it and I am sure that I am not the only one.

And this is where prayer comes in.  I know that God always knew that I would have this debt and these personal finance issues and somehow He wants to use this situation so that He can be glorified.  There were times that I thought He would send a fortune my way - maybe some well-to-do philanthropist would find out about my debt and pay it off.  Maybe I would happen upon a job with an unreasonably huge salary that would permit me to pay off my debt in full very quickly....So many different scenarios would appear in my daydreams, but none of them amounted to a hill of beans.  Sometimes I would even (so shamefully) think about how different my life would be if I wasn't a wife and mother, and could just dedicate myself to working two different jobs and not getting any sleep to may off my debt.  That is such a selfish thought that it very difficult to admit.  But it is true! And even typing out these thoughts I realize how much wrong thinking and anxiety I could have avoided if I simply prayed through all of this a long time ago.

So, yes, prayer.  If you are not a praying person, or not Christian you may be asking, what does this mean?  What good is praying about my debt going to do?  Will I get up from praying and find that the debt is gone? Well, let me explain as simply as possible with regards to debt.  The Bible says that God is a rewarder of those who diligently seek Him. It also says that the prayers of a righteous man avails much, that we can cast our cares upon Him because He cares about us and that if I don't depend on my own understanding, but acknowledge Him in all of my ways, that He will direct my paths.  I know that the more I seek Him by sincerely reading my Bible and inviting Him into all of my decisions and thoughts, and the more that I communicate my stress to Him and wait on Him to direct my paths, then I begin realize that the burden is no longer my responsibility to carry.  It clears my mind so that I can hear and receive the direction that He gives through His Word and His Holy Spirit.

I have noticed that with more prayer about my debt, that I have realized so many other things about myself....praying about debt leads to praying about income leads to praying about being a better employee leads to praying about being a better wife, mother and so on.  All of this goes hand in hand.  That is one of the reasons why I love listening to Dave Ramsey, because he reinforces all of these Biblical truths and helps me to apply them practically. And I can keep my sanity while eating the elephant one bite at a time :)

February Debt Push

The broken key that I fixed this month for free...saved 50 dollars that the locksmith asked for!

January was an eye-opener regarding our debt.  My husband got on board full force this month and we are both working together to get rid of this debt.  In February, I hope to blog almost daily about all of our debt solutions.  This month, we worked so diligently to reduce our expenses and, man, it ALL worked!  I will blog more about those solutions in the coming days.  I will also blog a bit more about the kind of debt we have and our plan to do the Dave Ramsey (yes, we are one of those folks who are huge fans of his Total Money Makeover) debt free scream by the time we turn 40 (in 2021!).  Our debt is not the normal-size debt...it is a huge elephant - student loan debt for advanced degrees.

We accomplished a lot this month besides reducing our expenses.  We started selling off some of our stuff.  And God has been so gracious that, as we have placed some things on the Internet, those items have been selling.  It is so freeing and exciting.  It hasn't garnered us a huge net profit, but every cent is going towards that mountain.  The Bible tells us that if we have faith the size of a mustard seed, we can tell that mountain to move and it will!  Well we have some big faith, but some small mustard-seed sized funds to put towards that mountain.  Nevertheless, over time, that mountain will move! And that is what keeps me motivated.

I even found 27 cents while taking a walk today and my first thought was "how can I put this towards my debt?" When something like that is your first thought, that is when you know you are on fire for debt freedom!  Tonight we have our final budget meeting and will figure out where to put the extra money that we have this month.  All in all we will have reduced our debt by about $1,300 this month.  Not too shabby for the first month.  Every little bit is a huge help to us.

In February, we will continue to work on reducing expenses, delaying gratification and earning extra income in any (legal and moral!) way possible :)

The Stress of Debt

Its time to sit down for a cup of tea together.  I know that I am not the only one going through this.  The anxiety of trying to figure out how to get ahead.  The fear of how to handle any financial crisis, real or imagined.  The dread of figuring out what to give up in order to get to where you want to go.  There is so much stress that accompanies having debt.  And there are no easy answers on how to handle this stress.  Its easy to say you should live on less than you make, but the reality is when you consider whatever your very real expenses are and compare them to your very real income, sometimes wiggle room just is not there.

Right now I am fully engaged in the desire to pay off my loans.  But the question I keep coming back to is HOW?  I have researched online and found many answers, but very few jibe with the life I am currently living.  And there are many things that I have real fears about giving up.  Ugh.  What do you do?

One of the answers that I committed to this weekend was selling stuff.  We are not pack rats, but we are also not minimalists.  I know that there are many things that I can go throughout my house and find and sell and bring in just a bit of money to pay down my (small) auto loan.  Hmm....I think I should do that right now...get a small laundry basket and start collecting things that I may be able to post on Craigslist for a small profit.

Also, I went grocery shopping yesterday and I am committed to stretching out the groceries for the remainder of the month with maybe a small stop at the grocery store for more milk, bread and produce.

At the end of the week I will report how much money I was able to earn outside of our regular income.  Lets just see what happens.  I will also try to post some of the frugal "use what you have" recipes that I have been creating lately so that we can be good stewards over what we have.

I already feel a bit less stressed :)

On My Feet

I have been on my feet all day preparing food.  I decided to do a little pantry challenge today. Instead of going to the grocery store, I am going to hold off for a couple more days, just to use up some more of what we have and stretch our money a bit further.  It is amazing the things you can find when you are forced to use what you have!  I made a bit pot of ravioli soup, and did not even realize I had a whole package of multi-colored peppers in the back of the fridge.  They were in great shape as well (and they are so expensive!).

I am so thankful for what we have been given, and I want to be a good steward over those things.  I can't believe how wasteful I have been over the years.  I have to repent!!  There are so many things that I have that need to be used up.  There are so many things that I want that I don't need!  I really have to continue to learn the art of delayed gratification.  God is so good and he has been so faithful to me in providing for me and my family and meeting all of our needs.  Funny how I was so determined to go grocery shopping today because we needed more food.  But when I stopped and thought about using what we have and then consider all of the wonderful things I have made today (muffins, steel cut oatmeal, waffles, a pot of beans, a pot of soup, stuffed peppers and hummus!) I realize that everything I need I already have.

What a great, simple lesson.  But it is so valuable for this culture that I am accustomed to of getting a lot of what you want, when you want it.  Even if it is gotten frugally.  Its quite possible that I don't need it!

What simple lessons are you learning today?

Exhaustion

This picture has nothing to do with the post.  I just like it and needed more than just words :)

It is 2017.  Praise God and what in the world?  These are the feelings I am having right now.  I was so happy when the clock turned to midnight on January 1.  I was so full of the excitement for the possibilities a new year holds.  I was full of resolutions, ready to get started.  I am a type A, and I always feel on Sundays (the first day of the week) and January 1 (the first of the year),  I can start over.  A new diet, a new attitude towards marriage, a new way to interact with my children, more diligence at work, on the diet, etc., all now seem infinitely possible. YES, I can do this! I can make this year better than ever!  This is what I want to scream over the mountain tops (which are nowhere to be found in the flat, completely sea-level region of the country in which I live).

Nevertheless, I never take into account the exhaustion that is sure to come after my attempts to make all things in myself new.  I am so exhausted today.  Yesterday, while my husband was away, I tried so hard to get a long to-do list accomplished.  I had visions of getting every chore and task done by 8 pm, so that I could take a long, hot bath, watch a chick-flick and get to bed early.  My Fitbit has been telling me that I don't get sufficient sleep.  I was dead set on getting everything done by8.  I set out the day with fierce determination.  Bible reading and praying done by 8 am - check....snacks joyfully doled out to children who awakened much earlier than is necessary on the weekend - check!  I was WINNING! I ignored the fact that I had to make breakfast and that the counter and sink were full of dishes from the previous day that I was too tired to tackle.  Still I wanted to maintain the good attitude and dogged determination that was driving me forward.  And I did!  I listened to podcasts about motherhood and parenting, multi-tasked until my hands were dry and carried a water bottle around the house while kindly instructing my children on their responsibilities.

Soon, however, it all began falling apart.  I wanted to stay on task and only do those things on the list.  However, its hard to vacuum a room when the floor is covered with toys that have yet to be put away. Times that by three when you count the other children's room and the living room.  Breakfast, lunch and dinner making were not on my list either...and neither was washing the dishes and cleaning the kitchen three times for all of those meals.

Then comes the boredom.  Yup, boredom.  From my children, that is.  Constant whines of "Mommy, I'm bored!" "I don't have anything to do!" and then grunts, sighs and stomping when I assign chores to help overcome that sense of boredom.  Boredom is often served up with a side of "Mommy, she (fill in the blank with some obnoxious thing another sibling did or said, or some slight or oversight caused by that or another sibling)."

Running up and down three flights of stairs all day, carrying baskets, replacing bedding on each bed, washing dishes, taking out trash (in several inches of snow) wore me out well before the sun went down (which happens fairly early around here because - WINTER). At one point, I hid in the bathroom, scrolling on my phone for just a two minute break from the arguing children, list of tasks that was taunting me and to breathe, when a child frantically knocks on my door to advise me that my daughter has just vomited.

It was at that point that I just wanted to walk away and keep walking.  What a terrible feeling.  It comes with its own set of guilt, bitterness and resentment.  Exhaustion will do that to you.  Funny, the  scripture reading in my Devotional Daily Bible spoke of these exact same sentiments in Hagar, Abram's second wife.  Hagar was Sarai's handmaiden.  Sarai was very old and had not been successful in having children.  She knew the Lord promised she and Abram a child, but she tried to circumvent the virtue of having patience while waiting on the Lord.  She told Abram to take Sarai to wife, so he did, and Hagar became pregnant.  Sarai became jealous and started to hate Hagar and dealt harshly with her, causing Hagar to flee.  But an angel from the Lord found Hagar hiding by a fountain and told her to return to Sarai AND SUBMIT to her!! He made no excuses for Sarai's behavior, he did not promise the behavior would improve or that conditions would get easy.  He told her that the Lord had a plan for Hagar's seed - that her son would be a wild man, who would be rebellious and cause tremendous conflict.  (Wow, this does NOT sound like it is enticing enough to make me want to return at all).  Lord, help me to keep all of this in mind while I go about my daily tasks!  It is not about me, it is about YOU!

The truth is, I am tired.  I am so exhausted.  I am determined to serve the Lord with joy and to offer a sacrifice of righteousness, but I am not sure what that looks like.  Does the fruit of this self-sacrifice and service look like having a spotless home?  Homemade meals every night?  Well-behaved children?  Bubble baths at the end of a long day?  I know that the exhaustion is a temporary affliction, but I also don't know how to make it stop.

I have to be honest with myself and everyone else around me: this is a really hard season for me right now.  I am tired, I am overworked, underpaid and under-appreciated.  Time with friends is very limited.  Desire to do anything more than sleep if I have free time (what's that?!) is uncommon.  I don't want to be the mother and wife that looks back on this time in my life with regret and resentment, or who has a heart attack at an early age after years of trying to do and be everything.

Last night, after completing less than half of the things on the super long list, I ended the day on the couch with anxiety, anger, bitterness and a bit of pain in my stomach.  I stayed up too long reading blogs of women who had been in a similar space, and forced myself to sleep after finding a similar opinion on each blog that a lack of sleep could produce symptoms akin to rage, schizophrenia, psychosis (not really, but that is what it feels like) if not taken by the horns.

This morning, I woke up with a different determination.  Some clarity.  I need an outlet.  God has provided one here.  I think about this space almost every day, but have not been able to make the time to DO this.  We have one computer (which my husband and children horde) and the phone app costs money.  I prefer free, thank you! But writing is a catharsis for me.  As with running, it helps me to make sense of the craziness that I sometimes feel that could potentially lead me to do something rash - like walk away and keep walking, leaving behind the vomit, laundry, trash and dishes.

I will try to commit to using this space at least once a week to get my thoughts together.  Help me, Lord, to glorify you in this space.  Speak to me in this space and in my head-space, so that I can serve YOU with gladness and joy.